To whom shall I go?

Every so often I receive what is meant to be a compliment; it generally goes something like this:

“Good for you for not turning your back on God.”

This often comes after they find out that despite being divorce, I have continued to homeschool my four children.

My response to them is the same as the response I gave a dear friend years ago when, in the midst of the worst of it all, she exhorted me to cling to Christ:

“To whom shall I go? [He] has the words of eternal life.”

I now offer these same words to you, dear reader, if you are in the midst of divorce, or any trial really.

I deserve no badge of honor for “not turning my back on God.”

What a fool I would have been do to that. At the time when I needed the Lord’s strength and wisdom most, why in the world would I go elsewhere?

God is not our little genie in the bottle, who comes at our beck and call to serve us.  And when He doesn’t give us what we want, we run away and throw a fit.

No!

God is the Creator of ALL things, my Master, my Lord.  I serve HIM.  And I gladly receive whatever He brings into my life because I know that He is also my loving Father who does what is best for me, and what brings Him the most glory.

When when marriage gets ripped away, I don’t stomp my foot in anger at God, demanding to know why He let this happen.

When marriage gets ripped away, I say, “Lord, not my will but Yours,” and I press into Him even harder through prayer and in the Scriptures. I read more ferverently to know His wisdom and to receive His comfort.

At a time when it feels like I have nothing left, I can say with confidence, “For my father and my mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me in.”  (Psalm 27:10)  Or put into context, “Though husband has deserted me, but the Lord will take me in.”

Why would I go elsewhere?  Why would I seek comfort from anything else or anyone else?  Why would I abandon the Lord when He saved me, and sustains me and is my ultimate comfort and joy.

My ultimate hope and joy for life was not found in my husband, so while him leaving hurt more than words can communicate and brought about the greatest trial of my life, my hope and joy remained, because Christ remained.  Christ had not left me. Christ had not foresaken me. Christ had not broken promises. All that He was, He still is, and forever will be.  And so I cling to the only unchanging Being.  I don’t run from Him and I don’t seek a replacement, for there is no replacement.

I said with Peter in the midst of my divorce, and I will continue to say all of my days,

“Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.”  John 6:68

Leave a Reply